UNDERSTANDING YOUR FOURTH CHAKRA

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​Once a child develops a sense of personal power and self-esteem, learning to give an attention to others as well as to receive it becomes the next stage of personal development. This stage includes the first lessons in learning about love of self as well as love of life itself.
From the active, fiery solar plexus, we thrust into a new and different realm. With the heart chakra we move into the softer touch of spirit. We transcend our ego of the first 3 chakras and grow toward soothing greater, deeper, stronger; and reach to the point of the entire chakra system. When this chakra is free of grief from old hurts, its opening is innocent, fresh, and radiant. The fight of the third chakra is replaced by acceptance in the fourth. If the third chakra has done its job, our circumstances are easier to accept. The aim of this chakra is to experience love, personal and non-personal. The heart is the mediator between ego and spirit.
 
The love we experience at the level of the Heart Chakra is distinctly different from the more sexual and passionate love of the second chakra. Sexual love is object oriented—the passion is stimulated by the presence of a particular person. In the fourth chakra, love is not dependent on outside stimulation, but experienced within as a state of being. In this way, it radiates outward, bringing love and compassion to whatever comes to our field.
 
In learning to give love, to share love and to be concerned about the well-being  of others, a child steps out of the “center of the Universe” role that can so easily develop when a child is doted on by family members. If this role is not gently removed through this natural maturation process, it could result in self-centered, thoughtless and demanding behaviour as an adult.
Conversely, children who are neglected or abused develop an entire different idea of love. Far from being in a position to love openly and trust others, abused and neglected children develop serious emotional problems and relationship difficulties. Not only does loving become associated with pain, but the human being cannot stop the instinct to reach out for love. Therefore in spite of the pain, abused and neglected children enter a cycle of continually associating pain with every level of human interaction, oftentimes losing the capacity to distinguish love from abusive forms of behaviour.
 
This chakra is the center of your body, and metaphorically speaking, love, is the center of your life. A person can effectively handle any number of crises of stresses if she or he has a strong, loving support system. Ultimately, without love, remaining healthy, much less healing oneself is almost impossible. In reviewing the previous chakra centers, and specifically, their relationship to the process of personal development, what is clearly visible is that one level of development builds upon the next one. Without an adequate sense of personal power, for instance, it is not possible to learn to give love and trust others without manipulation or insecure behaviour.
 
There are many things which reduce the flow of loving energy from one person to another. Undue attachment to one person can reduce the flow of energy that could come from many others. Jealousy reduces the flow of love as it dictates that they must flow within narrow limits. Homophobia, and agism restrict love. “You cannot touch him—he's of the same sex!” “She is too old.” “They are the wrong (colour, size, or background)” Any of these demarcations destroy the understanding of oneness and interdependence that is integral to the heart chakra. If we see love as infinite, an approach it from abundance instead of scarcity, we see that, in truth, love is self-perpetuating. The heart chakra perceives love in its 'unity', not its separation.
 
Withholding usually decreases what we receive as well. “I don’t think John likes me. He would probably think I was silly if I said how much I admire him”. Meanwhile, John is thinking about how cold and detached you are. Breaking this cycle removes some of the blocks between people on a heart chakra level. With third chakra empowerment, literally under our belts, it is easier to make the first move.
 
 
REJECTION 
Rejection is one of the most basic of human fears. This is not surprising when you consider how important it is that our core center remain healthy. Rejection threatens our basic internal balance and sense of self-acceptance. If the heart chakra is the integrator, then rejection may cause us to “dis-integrate”. Our positive feedback system is short-circuited. We turn this “non-love” against ourselves and start to self-destruct. Instead of feeling connected, we are cut off, separate, and isolated. For some it is easier to live without love altogether than to risk opening, sharing, and failing. This fear is integral to the understanding of the heart chakra. It works as a protective device, helping to balance the flow of input and output. It is the gatekeeper of the delicate heart chakra energy. Maintaining this energy, however, is a two-edged sword. The more tightly our gate closes, the more we restrict the passage of energy through all the chakras. This restriction simultaneously restricts the energy flow between our upper and lower chakras, causing alienation between our minds and bodies. Eventually, the heart chakra becomes depleted, and we have walled ourselves in a world alone.
 
Love is not a matter of getting connected; it is a matter of seeing that we already are connected within an intricate web of relationships that extends throughout life. It is a realization of “no boundaries”--that we are all made of the same essence, riding through time on the same planet, faced with the same problems, the same hopes and fears. It is a connection at the core that makes irrelevant skin colour, age, sex, looks, or money. More than anything, love is the deep sense of spiritual connection; it makes the mundane—sacred.
 
 
SELF-ACCEPTANCE
Self-acceptance is our first chance to practice unconditional love. It doesn’t mean that we have to give up striving to be better, but that our self-love is not conditional on some future or imagined change. When this occurs within our heart, it then becomes easier to accept others, faults and all, with the unconditional love. With acceptance and compassion for ourselves, it then becomes easier to make personal changes.
 
It is trusting that if you live your life from this place of consciousness, all will work out in the material world as well. It takes faith, because modern view of life is one of struggle, and in its insistence that you had better have a good plan to defend, protect and provide for yourself. This comes from a fear-based mentality—fear of scarcity. The path of the heart gives no harbour to this fear. You must have faith that you will draw to yourself a bountiful life by simply being in that place of magnetic attraction—you believe in abundance, and you attract abundance.
 
The quest for love goes to the heart of humanity. Experiencing love—both expressing and receiving—is a core drive within all of us. Finding out what you love to do and doing it, an then sharing the resultant joy with others, shows true heart. You are able to accept and genuinely care for others, without getting drawn into their dramas. Being able to give without a thought of what you will get in return, as well as being able to receive graciously from others, is a conclusive sign of an awakened heart.

​THE PERSPECTIVE OF LOVE

The first awakening of the Heart Chakra perspective are experienced acts of grace, and those rare, fleeting  moments when you feel at peace with yourself and the world. Everything is in balance and, seemingly, you haven’t a care in the world. You begin to enjoy your own company and with the lower chakras balanced, your ability to enjoy life's simple pleasures is enhanced. This state of being is at first a tease giving you a glimpse of the world beyond survival and competition. As you learn to spend more time in your heart, this becomes a way of life.
 
From this perspective, you see yourself reflected in everyone you meet. You naturally drop defences at the competitive way of living life. The heart would want to cooperate, not coerce, because the need to be right pulls you back into the lower chakras of competitive views. At the fourth chakra there is nothing to defend, and joy comes from an immense acceptance of life and other people. You become less attached to issues that seemingly bring you out of balance, and more attached to the experience of joy itself. Spending your time with harmony will bring more harmonious situations.
 

UNBALANCED EXPRESSION OF LOVE
Sentimentality is the main component of an unbalanced Fourth Chakra. The “bleeding heart” is unable to separate our problems from those of others. Thus, this connection with others is unhealthy and painful. Doing things for others as the price for being accepted is the common result of this imbalance.
 
Over-attachment in love and codependency are examples of imbalances when the needs for security of the lower chakras interfere with the natural expression of love. Love becomes need and loses much of its shine. “I love you” is being said, but “I need you” is what is meant. This can never lead to balance, because the needs of the lower chakras will worm their way into the Fourth Chakra connection. This leads to love with many strings attached. It is awakened at the heart, but clouded by lower chakra imbalances. These attachments don't allow for the freedom that true Fourth Chakra love is all about.
 
Opening the heart chakra requires an understanding and control of the breath,
​for it is the tool of physical and mental transformation.
 
         
         THE NECESSITY OF FORGIVENESS  (On Mystical Laws-by Carolyn Myss)
 
Scientists, physicians and psychologists who have researched the relationship between stress and illness have concluded that the ability or inability to forgive affects the outcome of serious illness. Genuine forgiveness is a self-initiated mystical act, and not a reasoning of the mind, that requires the assistance of grace to release you from the compulsive and often self-righteous chatter of the ego, which continually enforces a position of entitled anger and hurt. The capacity to forgive is nothing less than the acceptance of a higher principle of Divine justice, rather than earthly justice, as the organizing elements behind the events of your life.
 
You cannot reason your way through forgiveness. Forgiveness is an act beyond reason, so you must have certain power within you to carry out this transformation. It is a mystical act, not a reasonable act. A man said: “I need people to understand where i am coming from, and what my emotional needs are”. This man was burning up with rage, not truth, and it showed in his hands and feet, which were disfigured with arthritis. This man needed to forgive all the people he was angry with, and let the truth heal him. The truth does indeed sets you free, but you have to be able to hear it, absorb it, and use it. Forgiveness can be so powerful that a resurrection of the inner self will indeed occur, because you are retrieving your spirit from the dead zone of past traumas and unfinished business. No amount of logical chatter can ever motivate us to forgive. I am not sure how useful talk therapy is in this process, except that it serves to help us release the frustration of not being able to forgive. pray on the grace of forgiveness and let it melt through traumatic memories. Do your best not to fight your meltdown, because it will happen.
.........................from a cosmic perspective your life is far more complex than you can measure by the influence of a relationship.
 

PATTERNS AND FEARS

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• Fear of not being loved or the belief that you are not worthy of being loved.

 

• Harbouring guilt as a result of participating in personal acts of rejection or emotional neglect.

 

• Resentment that develops from seeing others receive more love and attention than yourself.

 

• Fear of showing or sharing affection.

 

• Developing guilt feelings as a result of using anger, hostility or criticism as substitute for love.

 

• Feeling emotionally paralysed by experiencing too much loneliness.

 

• Experiencing emotional contamination as a result of harbouring too many negative an judgemental feelings toward other people or other forms of life and holding on to old hurts.

 

• Developing emotional fears and bitterness as a result of believing you cannot forgive or directly refusing to forgive.

 

• Continually creating relationship that are emotionally unfulfilled or abusive.

 

• Guilt from feeling you have not successfully fulfilled your emotional commitments.

 

• Doing something or being with someone when your “heart is not in it”.

 

• Too much grief and sorrow, resulting in, literally, the development of a broken heart.​